Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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