i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I fill condoms, not promises.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize