We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Randomize