are you still at the devil's house?
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize