i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
cat food counts as protein by the way
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
