At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
So here I am, sexting at work.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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