I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
