White coat. Heels.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
