it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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