it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
