Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize
