let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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