ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I had to cum in my sink.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
