Define "chronic" masturbator.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
