Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
