your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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