Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize