I wanna passion pit in your ass
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
