your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
