it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
