He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize