none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize