I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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