North Korea, Best Korea!
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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