It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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