is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
It's blow job season.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Randomize
