So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
