I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
