You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
