it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
