love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Randomize
