question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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