Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
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