Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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