Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
