Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize