i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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