So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Two words: blizzard sex
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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