Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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