Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
