and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Randomize
