you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize