we're blogging at a bar
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
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