belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
