Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
