Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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