omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Randomize
