Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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