he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
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