it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
