he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
