I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
